permanently stuck between ”i really want to talk to you” and “i don’t want to annoy you”
You can be lonely even when you are loved by many people, since you are still not anybody’s one and only.
“
| — | Anne Frank, The Diary of a Young Girl (via jackthestripperfairieswearboots) |
Being single. Fucking. Sucks. Just. Sucks.
I HIGHLY value being single. It’s almost sad, and it frustrates the hell out of certain people (no names). I’m starting to believe I’m not fit for a relationship, unless it is with books and logic. The idea of love fascinates me, I…
I hate it. Personally, I’m very individualistic. I work best alone, I accomplish most things on my own, and constantly have to prove things to myself. However, I crave and lust for the attentions of others. Especially in romance. I’ve been called “needy”, and I can see the validity in that though I disagree with the general synopsis. I see it as that I’m always working alone, so I need companionship in order to relax. Solitude leads me to dark depressing thoughts and drives me crazy. I fall in love too easily, and keep almost all at arms length. Not a combination I recommend.
As for your situation; tragedy is beautiful at times, but not healthy for the mind. I think you ought to give it another shot, Mofo.
I’ve been trying, honestly. I’ve betrayed myself every time though, and in doing so I’ve hurt others who believe I could provide something different. I’m trying man, I am bored and I am lonely, but life has just begun. I want someone to wake up to every morning, someone who makes me want to strive to do better, someone who at the end of the day I only hope to have satisfied.
Because right now I have no drive, no ambition. I am nihilistic, everything is meaningless, other than people. I really want to love again. Every one that I believe I could love for the rest of my life live in other countries, and that doesn’t stop me, only detriments both of our capabilities. I’ve been talking to someone recently that I simply adore, but I just don’t know.
Time isn’t relative, really, not in this case. It’s going, going, gone.
At least you’re trying. And you might be to blame for the pain of others, but it’s better to hurt than feel nothing at all. I’m not saying to discount others’ pain as insignificant, but realize pain is natural and unavoidable. I’m with you on the bored and lonely, and I definitely want someone to wake up to, but more importantly someone to share myself with. I find my drive and achievement useless if I have no one to celebrate with. My motivation has been severely lacking recently, and things I should be ecstatic about leave me completely un-phased. As for your nihilism, as Walter, basically, said in The Big Lebowski: even Nazis were better than nihilists, because “at least they believed in something.” The geographic limitations that life places on love are cruel, but unavoidable. I wish you luck in this current pursuit, and if time is really going that quickly, it seems to me that you should have no choice other than to pursue full speed ahead!
Being single. Fucking. Sucks. Just. Sucks.
I HIGHLY value being single. It’s almost sad, and it frustrates the hell out of certain people (no names). I’m starting to believe I’m not fit for a relationship, unless it is with books and logic. The idea of love fascinates me, I…
I hate it. Personally, I’m very individualistic. I work best alone, I accomplish most things on my own, and constantly have to prove things to myself. However, I crave and lust for the attentions of others. Especially in romance. I’ve been called “needy”, and I can see the validity in that though I disagree with the general synopsis. I see it as that I’m always working alone, so I need companionship in order to relax. Solitude leads me to dark depressing thoughts and drives me crazy. I fall in love too easily, and keep almost all at arms length. Not a combination I recommend.
As for your situation; tragedy is beautiful at times, but not healthy for the mind. I think you ought to give it another shot, Mofo.
Bold what applies to you…
01. You’re currently confused about someone’s feelings for you.
02. You have been in a serious relationship before.
03. You own an iPod of some sort.
04. You do not like your sibling’s girlfriend/boyfriend.
05. You drink too much alcohol.
06. You have been to the Olive Garden.
07. You have taken medicine of some sort this week.
08. It is really cold in your house right now.
09. You are extremely dependent on others.
10. You do not like to express your feelings in front of others.
11. You ate a lot of food today.
12. It doesn’t take much for you to cry.
13. People consider you a sappy sort of person.
14. Someone in your family is rich.
15. You have been to Disney World or Disneyland before.
16. You hate when people constantly talk about themselves.
17. You are a good listener, but you hate complainers.
18. Someone has called you for a serious medical emergency before.
19. You have had a serious surgery.
20. Your house has a spare bedroom.
21. Your house has 2+ bathrooms.
22. You have at least one cousin under the age of three.
23. You have never held a baby before.
24. You can’t handle toddlers.
25. You have a painting in your room.
26. You have been to Canada.
27. You have been to Mexico.
28. You love cherry flavored lollipops.
29. You celebrate Easter.
30. You observe Lent.
31. You are Catholic.
32. You do not believe in God.
33. Religion is not important to you.
34. You want to have a small family one day.
35. You would rather have more sons than daughters.
36. You have more aunts than uncles.
37. You hate being too warm.
38. You currently are way more tan than everyone else.
39. You wear shoes in your house.
40. Your parents are clean freaks.
41. You are more messy than clean.
42. You are currently angry at someone.
43. Patience is so not a virtue to you.
44. Your desk is extremely clean.
45. Your bed sheets are either blue, green, black, or white.
46. When you hear “black & white” it reminds you of Katy Perry’s ‘Hot n Cold’ song.
47. You have no clue what that song is.
48. You think rap artists are completely pathetic.
49. You are glad George Bush will be out of office. <—wut
50. Politics are boring to you.
51. You take a vitamin daily.
52. You feel like you are sick often.
53. You hate throwing up.
54. You think it’s gross when people set food down on their desk at school with no napkin.
55. You also find it gross that people sit on top of desks.
56. You are now cringing at the thought of someone’s food where someone’s ass was.
57. You love getting bubble baths.
58. You do not like chocolate at all.
59. You are allergic to nuts.
60. You have been stung by a bee before.
61. You have been to the emergency room before for something.
62. One of your parents is 50 or older.
63. You are the baby of your immediate family.
64. You hate broccoli.
65. Cooked carrots are good, though.
66. You probably go on Xanga too much to be healthy. <—how old is this survey?
67. You are really comfortable right now.
68. You like witty t-shirts.
69. You are a major fan of underground bands.
70. You have been on an airplane before.
71. You are not afraid of heights.
72. You consider yourself paranoid.
73. You have had a panic attack before.
74. The thought of being old and alone bothers you.
75. You would choose the elderly over children.
76. You feel like you’re living in the wrong decade.
77. You have smoked weed before.
78. You think it’s way too cold outside right now.
79. You love the thought of sleeping in tomorrow morning.
80. You would rather go to bed early and get up early.
81. You feel like the early bird catches the worm.
82. You are a big breakfast eater.
83. You are currently suffering from the common cold.
84. You are craving something salty.
85. You have been in a car today.
86. There is something plugged in near you.
87. You have heard of the TV show “Private Practice.”
88. You do not like medical television shows.
89. You prefer horror to comedies.
90. You adore Leo & Kate.
91. You think high-wasted pants look good.
92. You hate cheesy movies.
93. You enjoy camping out.
94. Bugs don’t bother you.
95. You do well in school without trying.
96. You are extremely jealous of someone currently.
